[et_pb_section bb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”3.15″ use_background_color_gradient=”on” background_color_gradient_start=”rgba(252,168,58,0.7)” background_color_gradient_end=”#edf1c4″ custom_padding=”40px|0px|0|0px|false|false” next_background_color=”#ffffff”][et_pb_row use_custom_gutter=”on” gutter_width=”1″ make_equal=”on” background_color_1=”rgba(255,255,255,0.4)” background_color_2=”rgba(255,255,255,0.4)” padding_top_bottom_link_1=”true” padding_top_bottom_link_2=”true” padding_left_right_link_1=”true” padding_left_right_link_2=”true” padding_top_1=”30px” padding_top_2=”30px” padding_right_1=”40px” padding_right_2=”40px” padding_bottom_1=”30px” padding_bottom_2=”30px” padding_left_1=”40px” padding_left_2=”40px” _builder_version=”3.15″][et_pb_column type=”3_4″][et_pb_text _builder_version=”3.17.2″ header_font=”||||||||” header_font_size=”45px” header_2_font=”||||||||” header_2_font_size=”46px”]<\/p>\n
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Every week, I’ll be sharing a new grudge that’s not in my book — sometimes mine, sometimes someone else’s (with their permission, obviously!) There are plenty of new grudges born every minute – send yours to grudgescanbegood@gmail.com if you would like to share it and have it analysed!<\/p>\n
[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_4″][et_pb_image src=”https:\/\/sophiehannah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/big-cactus-trans-25-1.svg” _builder_version=”3.15″ max_width=”98%” max_width_tablet=”68%” max_width_phone=”60%” max_width_last_edited=”on|phone” custom_padding_tablet=”||30px|” custom_padding_phone=”||30px|” custom_padding_last_edited=”on|phone”]
\n[\/et_pb_image][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section bb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”3.15″ use_background_color_gradient=”on” background_color_gradient_start=”#edf1c4″ background_color_gradient_end=”rgba(252,168,58,0.7)” prev_background_color=”#ffffff” next_background_color=”#ffffff”][et_pb_row background_color_2=”rgba(255,255,255,0.4)” padding_top_bottom_link_2=”true” padding_left_right_link_2=”true” padding_top_2=”30px” padding_right_2=”40px” padding_bottom_2=”30px” padding_left_2=”40px” _builder_version=”3.15″][et_pb_column type=”1_4″][et_pb_image src=”https:\/\/sophiehannah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/How-to-hold-a-grudge.gif” _builder_version=”3.15″]
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Sent in by Anonymous<\/em><\/p>\n In my second year of teaching, a formal complaint was brought by another member of staff against a young, male PE teacher who happened to be a tutor in the boarding house where I was the deputy housemaster. We weren\u2019t friends, but I knew him a bit because he\u2019d come to help out on a couple of house trips I\u2019d run. He was laddish, but a good teacher. Before I knew a complaint had been made, I was called in to see a lady on the school management team. She was a nice lady, about 60, with a reputation for being sort of sweet but ineffectual, and I knew her and her husband socially \u2013 we\u2019d been round to dinner and stuff. Anyway, she called me in and asked me if she could chat to me about this young male teacher, and she started asking me about what he was like, about how I\u2019d seen him behave, and that sort of stuff. I just chatted honestly and told her what I thought.<\/p>\n Then, the next day, I got a formal email from her, with everything I had said typed up as a formal statement. Her email said, in effect: please can you confirm that the statement below is an accurate reflection of everything you said in our meeting? I confirmed that it was. What I didn\u2019t know, though, was that the reason she had contacted me was that the young male member of staff had named me as his official character witness \/ supporting member of staff in his disciplinary hearing. I\u2019ve never forgiven her for tricking me into thinking we were \u2018just chatting\u2019 and then using everything I\u2019d said as part of a formal process which she really should have informed me about.<\/p>\n SOPHIE SAYS:<\/strong><\/p>\n This is very sneaky behaviour on the part of the woman in question. This is a Manipulation Grudge, which is a very common type, you might be reassured to learn! As well as the clear manipulation involved, there is a strong element of outright insult and the quite open revelation of a lack of respect. She knew her manipulation would be absolutely obvious to you at a certain point, and she didn\u2019t think enough of you to care that you would soon find out you\u2019d been tricked. Her brazenness, for me, makes this Blatant Disrespect Grudge as well as a Manipulation Grudge. All in all, highly grudgeworthy!<\/strong><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_image src=”https:\/\/sophiehannah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/big-cactus-trans-25-1.svg” _builder_version=”3.15″ max_width=”16%” module_alignment=”right”] Discover Sophie’s Grudge Type classification system in HOW TO HOLD A GRUDGE – available from all good book retailers now!<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”3.17.2″ saved_tabs=”all” custom_padding=”50px||” global_module=”2151″][et_pb_column type=”4_4″][et_pb_text global_parent=”2151″ header_2_font_size=”40px” _builder_version=”3.17.2″ header_font=”||||||||” header_2_font=”|700|||||||” header_2_text_align=”center”]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_code global_parent=”2151″ _builder_version=”3.17.2″][ess_grid alias=”grudge”][\/et_pb_code][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section bb_built=”1″ custom_padding_last_edited=”on|tablet” _builder_version=”3.15″ use_background_color_gradient=”on” background_color_gradient_start=”rgba(252,168,58,0.7)” background_color_gradient_end=”#edf1c4″ custom_margin_tablet=”0px|||” custom_margin_last_edited=”on|desktop” custom_padding_tablet=”0px|||” prev_background_color=”#ffffff”][et_pb_row background_color_1=”rgba(255,255,255,0.4)” padding_top_1=”19px” padding_right_1=”2px” padding_bottom_1=”2px” _builder_version=”3.15″][et_pb_column type=”1_2″][et_pb_text _builder_version=”3.15″ text_font=”|600|on||||||” text_text_color=”#eb5e26″ custom_margin=”||0px|” custom_padding=”|40px|0px|40px|false|true”]<\/p>\n \u201c<\/strong><\/em>About devastating historical events and atrocities, we often say, \u2018Never forget\u2019. Why? Is it that we want to extend the suffering for as long as possible? No, of course not \u2014 it\u2019s because we know that history (the horrible bits of it especially) contains useful lessons and warnings that we would be fools to ignore.<\/p>\n Yet about upsetting personal incidents, we often hear people say, \u2018Don\u2019t hold a grudge. Move on, for your own sake.\u2019 Every time we say this, we are effectively asking someone to forget the important warnings and lessons from their own life history.\u201d<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_image src=”https:\/\/sophiehannah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/flat-cactus-27.svg” _builder_version=”3.15″ max_width=”14%” module_alignment=”right”] #1 GRUDGE OF THE WEEK Every week, I’ll be sharing a new grudge that’s not in my book — sometimes mine, sometimes someone else’s (with their permission, obviously!) There are plenty of new grudges born every minute – send yours to grudgescanbegood@gmail.com if you would like to share it and have it analysed! A STITCH-UP […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1838,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1798","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-how-to-hold-a-grudge"],"yoast_head":"\n
\n[\/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”3.15″]<\/p>\nOTHER GRUDGE GOODIES<\/h2>\n
\n[\/et_pb_image][\/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_2″][et_pb_signup aweber_list=”|none” mailchimp_list=”Divi Builder MailChimp|a80367e04a” title=”To make sure you hear all Sophie’s book news first, enter your email address here to join her mailing list:” button_text=”JOIN” form_field_background_color=”#ffdab5″ form_field_text_color=”#c4c4c4″ focus_text_color=”#000000″ disabled_on=”off|off|off” _builder_version=”3.16″ header_font=”||||||||” header_text_color=”#000000″ header_font_size=”24″ body_text_color=”#000000″ background_color=”#fcc57e” custom_button=”on” button_text_color=”#ffffff” button_bg_color=”#fe0000″ border_style=”solid” focus_border_color=”#ffffff” button_text_size__hover_enabled=”off” button_text_size__hover=”null” button_one_text_size__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_text_size__hover=”null” button_two_text_size__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_text_size__hover=”null” button_text_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_text_color__hover=”null” button_one_text_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_text_color__hover=”null” button_two_text_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_text_color__hover=”null” button_border_width__hover_enabled=”off” button_border_width__hover=”null” button_one_border_width__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_width__hover=”null” button_two_border_width__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_width__hover=”null” button_border_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_border_color__hover=”null” button_one_border_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_color__hover=”null” button_two_border_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_color__hover=”null” button_border_radius__hover_enabled=”off” button_border_radius__hover=”null” button_one_border_radius__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_radius__hover=”null” button_two_border_radius__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_radius__hover=”null” button_letter_spacing__hover_enabled=”off” button_letter_spacing__hover=”null” button_one_letter_spacing__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_letter_spacing__hover=”null” button_two_letter_spacing__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_letter_spacing__hover=”null” button_bg_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_bg_color__hover=”null” button_one_bg_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_bg_color__hover=”null” button_two_bg_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_bg_color__hover=”null” \/][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n<\/span>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"